"GOD! Why can’t I be vampire?!"
::from above::”OK THEN.”
Where do baby goths come from
The ElderGoth Cabal (which does not exist) says that this question is one of the eternal mysteries. Any theories involving cemeteries by moonlight, dried roses, black lace, and dusty old books are unsubstantiated and unproven rumors, and should be ignored.
WE GROW THEM IN LABS
…have just been informed (by people that don’t exist) we weren’t supposed to say that…
THERE IS NO ELDERGOTH CABAL, AND WE DON’T TALK ABOUT WHERE BABY GOTHS COME FROM. This is clearly spelled out in the handbook …
… what? THERE IS NOTHING FOR ANY OF YOU TO BE INFORMED OF, JUST GO BACK TO YOUR TUMBLR SCROLLING.
Dave Vanian is telling you to move along- there’s nothing to see here.
Especially that face.
LOOK AWAY! LOOK A-WAAY!!
Aw, your eyes glazed over. I’ll just put this bib on you to catch the drool and come back later.
Okay, in that anon you just published I wasn't being completely honest. I also want a white streak in my hair. I want it to look just like Dave's. I haven't told anyone because it probably means I have no chance of recovery, and that would be upsetting to hear.
How many people could I save if it wasn’t for Dave Vanian?
HE’S ALWAYS PLOTTING AGAINST ME!
Confession: Sometimes I go into those fast food restaurants where they call your name when your order's ready and pretend my name is Eloise in hopes that someone behind the counter will call out my name in a smooth, creamy baritone. Is this ok?
I used to do the same thing with “Marian” at coffee shops; never worked-thank goodness.
Try using the name “Mickey” instead, and maybe you’ll get someone cheering that you’re so fine one day.